Sandwich Filler of The Apocalypse (C)2012 Andy Vickers

That will be the most played song on any radio station today, how long Michael Stipe and Co have to spend the royalties is up for conjecture.  I do feel fine, by the way.  I am however currently sheltering under my desk and posting this just as the new day, the 21st of December 2012 begins over the international date line, if the predictions are true then it may be too late to worry about your to-do lists.

Here in England it’s Thursday the 20th at lunchtime, and I am eating the sandwich filler shown above which as can clearly be seen needs to be eaten before the end of the 21st.  (I actually tried to find a product with a best before date of the 21st December but failed, by one day.  N.B. if the world does end, I assume no responsibility.)

Fortean Times has been running a regular column throughout the last year to record the wide range of theories about just what is supposed to be happening on the other side of the world at the moment.  As the day has approached some of the doomsayers have changed their opinions, under a barrage of arguments along the lines of “and how, exactly, is the world to be destroyed” or perhaps a fear of total destruction to the view that it will be a “spiritual end of the world” which will lead us to be a more enlightened world filled with peace and harmony come tomorrow morning.  I suspect, and I know this is controversial, that after the 21st guns will fall silent, enemies will look at each other across borders…  and then all will continue as before.

I should have, perhaps started this earlier but it might have been a bit long then.  Some highlights of the last year’s theories (culled from Fortean Times’ 2012 Watch) include:  William Roache from Coronation Street believes that the world will move into a “higher vibration” and many of the Earth’s inhabitants will discover the energy and love in the universe and that they are spiritual beings, Daniel Srsa agrees though believes that the cataclysmic end for us all will in fact cleanse the Earth of all the negative karma we’ve built up. Barbara Hand Clow, an Astrologer, firmly believes that only those who embrace the “Nine Realms of Consciousness of the Pleiadians” will be saved for they will be in “ecstatic communion with nature and the creator” – she has courses to help you to embrace.  The Pleiadians say that “harmonic biology” from Earth will be spread across the galaxy on 21st December.

Nancy Leider claims that Planet X or Nibiru which has been orbiting opposite the Earth for many years will approach soon and will cause Earth’s poles to flip – she received this information from the Zeta Reticulans, the idea of a pole reversal is also shared by Patrick Geryl who foresees this leading to “pure, unimaginable horror…  terrible hunger, cold and pain.”  All our electronics will be fried, volcanic eruptions and earthquakes will destroy all buildings, transport systems and books.  As Peter Brookesmith says in his FT article, Geryl’s version of the apocalypse is one of many new New Age visions of a future less based around peace and love but more scorched earth and burned sinners.

Of course we had the 2012 Olympics which it was predicted would be interrupted by a UFO and was interrupted, by an airship.  However there are still those who believe that the games were riddled with “Zionist conspiracy” symbols not least the logo itself which could be rearranged to spell ZION.  Must be true then.  David Icke still believes that our world leaders are reptilian aliens so hasn’t had much to say to date.

Most of the ideas are pretty much the same as these – a natural event will destroy the world literally or a consciousness shift will destroy the world we know figuratively.  Of course there have been many, many books, courses and DVDs sold either explaining the coming apocalypse or offering advice on how to survive it.

Meanwhile NASA have had to repeat messages that the world isn’t going to end, even resorting to a video explaining why the world didn’t end which they’ve released ten days early.    In Russia there has been panic over the coming end of days.  Microsoft have noticed many signs of the apocalypse on the internet including a lack of food photos on instragram and Internet Explorer 10 being good.  Finally the peaceful French village of Bugarach has been beseiged by hordes of people who believe that the mountain on which it sits houses a “UFO Garage” and tomorrow this will open up and carry all those present away to salvation – shades of Close Encounters of the Third Kind?  The film was, it is said, inspired by a visit to the village by Steven Spielberg.  Once a magnet for walkers and climbers now the tranquility of the Pic de Bugarach is punctuated by esoteric visitors chanting and leaving statues and artifacts on the rocks.  Locals do feel there is something special about the mountain, a kind of feeling about it but not that it’s an alien hideout.  As is often the case a number of “gurus” have moved to the area and charge up to 800 euros for a course to help you commune with the mountain, it’s energy and its aliens.  Understandably the mayor has now closed off access to the mountain altogether and locals have pleaded with visitors not to come on the 21st.

As for me, I’ll just wish my mum a happy birthday for Saturday while I’m here, just in case but I don’t think anything will happen.  Having said that though with how our world is at the moment perhaps we will start to see a change in attitudes away from greed and violence but often such changes happen in cycles anyway and as this article on I09 tells us we could bring about our own destruction.  If I’m wrong then feel free to say “ha ha, I was ri…”

[Fortean Times – see issue 285 for their 2012 Special and from 286 onwards for monthly updates, unless, well, you know.]